• yesno
  • secretagent
  • mrcaution
  • sally
  • firecar1
  • jacobcranberries
  • thescopewins
  • bureaucratlg
  • sink
  • bulbsoff
  • moonbell
  • zeeblg
  • darkness

It was one of Uncle Zeeb’s awesome bedtime stories–for God’s sake, he once shook the Pope’s hand. He wouldn’t lie about this.

Bubbleoney

Bubbleoney

By
Jan 1, 2015

Effervescently addictive luncheon meat which made the consumer quite simple minded after only a few sittings. Thought to originate during…

In the Land of Maybe
In Found

In the Land of Maybe

By
Dec 15, 2014

She gravitated to all that was spicy, except for her lovers who were always named Frank. Frank experienced life’s created mundaneness through the eyes of a warrior. Every decision, an epic landscape riddled with yes no’s and the occasional…

Secret Agent

Secret Agent

By
Oct 15, 2014

Mike’s secret agent training complemented by a keen sense of reality allowed him to deduce that he was now bugged all the time. Not wanting to give away his location or words he stood silently till the danger was shut off. He did this for…

Photon
In Found

Photon

By
Sep 15, 2014

Photon was well known for his overly dramatic wall-melting death-threat-filled entrances, yet this time everyone dropped to the floor in laughter. The “MAN” Photon was speaking of was Bob, a big mouth with a smart phone…

Mr. Caution

Mr. Caution

By
Jul 15, 2014

As Mr. Caution drove home through intersidereal space, he suddenly sensed that a moment of the next present would begin to terrorize his ideas. This anticipatory dread followed him all the way home. Mr. Caution decided to never take…

Sally Burped

Sally Burped

By
Jun 15, 2014

When Sally burped it smelled like guts and tasted of peanut butter. Sitting on the train day after day she became more unaware of her surroundings It was as though some self defense mechanism was saving get her from the smartly dresses…

Window Crank

Window Crank

By
Apr 15, 2014

Jesse loved to pontificate especially from the back seat of his grandfathers car. This backseat pulpit was an important part of the presentation in Jesses mind. Equal distribution of his thoughts was part of the…

Jacob Cranberries

Jacob Cranberries

By
Apr 15, 2014

Not thinking logically was usually Jacob Cranberries downfall. He couldn’t remember whether he dreamt or read that gravity only payed attention to waistlines when determining the weight of a human. Being a man who needed answers not…

The Scope Wins
In Found

The Scope Wins

By
Sep 14, 2013

Reading a few posters / brochures while I wait for my doctor, first one is about how your first defense against gout is information. Yet the brochure holder is bone dry, I guess gout wins this time. Next to that is a poster about getting…

Bureaucat

Bureaucat

By
Aug 28, 2013

This is what a cat sees one second before the end of life number nine is registered with the governmental agencies in the feline afterlife. Unfortunately for the welcoming committee a feline can only respond one way once exposed to said…

Magic Words
In Found

Magic Words

By
Jul 2, 2013

To himself Ural referred to Aunt Betty’s elaborate book of social etiquette as “How to Visit Sunday Island”—while she might consider her declarations guides for leading a civilized existence, to Ural it simply pointed out ways a clever boy…

Bulbs

Bulbs

By
May 20, 2013

He was a person of interest, but only to himself. My books are thin. Laying flat in the

Soft Walls

Soft Walls

By
May 15, 2013

There is something to say about days past, when pounding your head into a wall was…

Cats
In Found

Cats

By
May 6, 2013

A mature cat’s regular state of hyper-acute sensitivity which originates from a genetic defect in the species known as Thispetas isa goofeotomous. The defect presents unpredictably during the cute-cuddles stage of feline life cycle and…

Moon Bell

Moon Bell

By
Apr 17, 2013

Per a well known and established alien theorist, Nasa has known for years that the moon is hollow. An undisclosed Apollo mission accidentally crashed during a landing making it ring like a bell for hours. Unfortunately for…

Sleep

Sleep

By
Apr 15, 2013

My plane just landed in Somnia, due to a multitude of sheep getting sucked into the…

Mildred

Mildred

By
Apr 15, 2013

Mildred didn’t think bringing an expensive laptop on the train was a bad idea at the time. She was later quoted saying from the hospital bed, “Oh, now I just feel silly. I thought the kids were just stealing apples from people on the train.”

Too Early

Too Early

By
Apr 15, 2013

Would you like a coffee of your receipt? I’m sorry what did you say? Do you want a…

Stubby Thumbs

Stubby Thumbs

By
Apr 15, 2013

A constant reminder of her inventor fathers inheritance a double blip in a near perfect existence, stubby thumbs and virtual keyboards, a devils dance indeed. She had grown to accept that Jim’s would always become Kim’s and Kim’s would…

Uncle Zeeb

Uncle Zeeb

By
Oct 28, 2012

Uncle Zeeb always wore shirts 20 years out of style pressed as the day they were unwrapped from the packaging. Entering a room, Zeeb’s presence was announced in advance by the clop of perfectly polished shoes two sizes too large.

Sniffer
In Found

Sniffer

By
May 28, 2012

Tonu didn’t possess mad skills of any sort, so working from home meant starving at home. He tended to secure any odd job that allowed him to wear sandals while making his living— for, more than anything, Tonu loved the freedom sandals…

Demistoe

Demistoe

By
Apr 15, 2012

John Bacterium, Carl Pseudomonas and Ricky Solanacearum would get drunk on cheap vodka and plot Tom Tomato’s demise.

Flempa

Flempa

By
Apr 15, 2012

A semi-clear oily poison added to gasoline to prevent its use as a mayonnaise substitute by Italian submarine mechanics.

Just a Dog

Just a Dog

By
Apr 15, 2012

We would have gotten away with it had Floyd just kept his head inside the car like I asked.